dendritejungle: (Default)
dendritejungle ([personal profile] dendritejungle) wrote2006-05-11 08:02 pm
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A treasure trove of chocolatey goodness...

Chocolatines, for those not fortunate enough to have experienced these divine pastries, are essentially croissants with chocolate inside. But let me be clear: there is a WORLD of difference between the sickeningly-sugary, insipid Toronto versions with sad wanna-be milk chocolate dribbled inside and the rich, flaky pastry from Montreal with a thick strip of dark chocolate running through its core that I miss SO DESPERATELY. Heat these things up in the oven until the chocolate melts and...well, let's just say after eating one (or two, or three), I find myself practically wanting a cigarette and a little lie-down.

Practically. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Anyway. As you may have gathered, the real thing is wretchedly hard to come by on this side of the Quebec border. So when I have friends coming in from Montreal, I usually ask them to bring me a dozen or so. More than that I couldn't really fit in my teeny condo freezer.

Then I bought a chest freezer. The mere thought of how many chocolatines I could stash in this baby took my breath away. I would never lack for them again!

When I so informed Sex Geek who was coming into town for a conference, she kindly asked me how many dozen I would like. I checked my freezer, and to my chagrin realized I didn't actually have that much extra space: I'd basically filled the thing with healthy prepared foods since I'm too damn lazy to cook. (Did I say lazy? I meant too tired after work.)

So I emailed her back thanks, but I thought I could only really fit in about fifteen.

Can anyone else spot the failure in the communication here? Because it wasn't until she arrived and apologized for only bringing sixty-four chocolatines since she had BOUGHT OUT THE STORE that I realized she'd thought I meant fifteen DOZEN. I, on the other hand, had simply meant fifteen, period.

Sixty-four chocolatines. A box, and two very full bags. If I may paraphrase my dear friend Twistedhip: gentle readers, this day I had chocolatines coming out of my nostrils.

A surfeit of the best in pastry goodness this world has to offer, and I had nowhere to put them! I can tuck 'em away, dear readers, and my excesses in this regard have made friends blanch: I eat two or three at a time, for one or two meals a day. For days on end. Days.

(I know. If I were an atheist, I would use the fact that I'm only 115-120 lbs. as my prima facie evidence that there is no God - or justice in the world, for that matter. However, being more agnostic than anything else, and a firm believer in comeuppance, I am instead quietly convinced that I will someday end up with Type II diabetes.)

But this volume was beyond even my abilities. However, there was NO WAY I was going to let even one of these precious morsels go to waste, so I rolled up my sleeves and crammed, reorganized and ate my way through enough space in the freezer to store 'em. And then I ate a dozen over three days. And then I took another dozen to work. And then I brought some to knitting circle.

So it all worked out in the end. And in retrospect (and after the initial shock), it's actually been nice to have so many since I could finally share them with all the people to whom I'd blathered endlessly about them.

But now I only have a couple dozen left. And as the numbers dwindle, I'm becoming increasingly posessive and parsimonious. I feel like Smaug the dragon, guarding his gold. Or Gollum, with his precioussss...

The solution is clear. Obviously, next time, I have to do away with all that pesky "healthy" food in my freezer and create a bottomless chocolatine chest.... *drooooool*

Re: EVIL? I'LL show you EVIL...

[identity profile] dendritejungle.livejournal.com 2006-07-05 12:35 am (UTC)(link)
Cool! Apparently evil is hilarious. Who knew? And from Toronto. But somehow that's less surprising.